Since we have come back from our vacation, I have just been hit with all sorts of inspiration, determination, and artistic ideas. For the first time in the past few years I've gotten a true vision of what I want my art to be.
I want my images to eradicate emotions, I want my art to capture what I feel in my heart and soul. I want to stop comparing myself to others, and compare myself to how I was yesterday. I've gotten a random swift kick in the ass to do better, To never ever settle for anything less than perfection in my own eyes, & I've got a mindset like none I've ever had before.
I can accomplish anything I set my mind to
For those of you who don't already know I struggle with anxiety/panic/agoraphobia...it's exhausting, depressing, lonely, and dark. For me our vacation was a test of my own strength. If you where to ask me a few months ago "would you like to go on a road trip, or travel somewhere?" my answer would have been: " I would love to travel somewhere but I can't, I can't ride in the car long, I'll have a panic attack, something bad will happen".
My fears would stop me from going just across the bridge to Tampa, or going out at night time, or even going to the store. I've turned down sessions because I feared I would have a panic attack and crash while driving. I decided that for the sake of my future, my happiness, and for my family I would put my fears aside, face them head on and see how strong I truly am. I am much stronger than I could have ever hoped for. Being able to deal with traveling with a clear mindset, and enjoy and embrace the world around me was something I hadn't felt in a long long time. It has truly opened so many doors for me, now I know I can travel, I can do this, I will do this. I'm unstoppable.
This is not just about my photography, but also about my life in general. I will no longer let my fears control my life. #fearless